ross
Elio Addict
What do you call four Mexicans drowning in quicksand?
Quatro Sinko
Quatro Sinko
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Jokes! ( Not Necessarily Work Safe )
- Thread starter Keith Dahl
- Start date
ross
Elio Addict
My best Buddy is a Mexican and He told me these.
BigWarpGuy
Elio Addict
I was told a joke by a Polish friend. He said that during the war, the Polish threw hand grenades at the Germans. The Germans picked them, pull the ring and threw them back.
OR The roofers are coming ! The roofers are coming!!!
Mel
Elio Addict
Heard two guys talking about a full service gas station that offered free sex with a fill-up.
The 2nd guy says, "Really? How often do you go there?"
"I haven gone yet, but I know it's true. My sister told me about it. She's been several times"
The 2nd guy says, "Really? How often do you go there?"
"I haven gone yet, but I know it's true. My sister told me about it. She's been several times"
champsman
Elio Addict
I stopped by the Dodge Dealership yesterday, for a look at the new 1500 pickup.
Just for fun, I took it out for a test drive. I wanted to sense that new truck
"feel" before they become old.
The salesperson (a nice looking lady wearing a “Hillary for President” lapel pin) sat in the
passenger seat next to me, describing the truck and all its "wonderful" options.
The seats were of particular interest. She explained that the seats directed warm air to your butt in the winter and directed cool air to your butt in the summer heat.
Feeling like messing with her, I mentioned that this must be a Republican truck.
Looking a bit angry, she asked why I thought it was a Republican truck.
I explained that if it were a Hillary truck, the seats would just blow smoke up your ass
year-round.
I had to walk back to the dealership.
She had no sense of humor.
Just for fun, I took it out for a test drive. I wanted to sense that new truck
"feel" before they become old.
The salesperson (a nice looking lady wearing a “Hillary for President” lapel pin) sat in the
passenger seat next to me, describing the truck and all its "wonderful" options.
The seats were of particular interest. She explained that the seats directed warm air to your butt in the winter and directed cool air to your butt in the summer heat.
Feeling like messing with her, I mentioned that this must be a Republican truck.
Looking a bit angry, she asked why I thought it was a Republican truck.
I explained that if it were a Hillary truck, the seats would just blow smoke up your ass
year-round.
I had to walk back to the dealership.
She had no sense of humor.
Yesterday, scientists in the USA revealed that beer contains small traces of female hormones.
To prove their theory, they fed 100 men 12 pints of beer and observed that 100% of them started to talk nonsense and couldn't drive.
To prove their theory, they fed 100 men 12 pints of beer and observed that 100% of them started to talk nonsense and couldn't drive.
Two men were driving through Dubuque, Iowa when they got pulled over by a Dubuque Police Officer.
The cop walked up and tapped on the window with his nightstick.
The driver rolled down his window and "WHACK," the cop smacked him in the head with his nightstick.
"What the hell was that for?" the driver asked.
"You're in Iowa, son," the Officer answered.
"When we pull you over in Iowa, you better have your license ready by the time we get to your car."
"I'm sorry. Officer," the driver said, "I'm from Wisconsin and didn't know your laws here".
The officer runs a check on the guy's license--he's clean and gives the guy his license back.
The officer then walks around to the passenger side and taps on the window.
The passenger rolls down the window and "WHACK," the officer smacks him on the head with the nightstick.
"What'd you do that for?" the passenger demands.
"Just making your wish come true." replied the officer.
"Making WHAT wish come true?" the passenger asks.
"Because I know you Cheese head types," the Officer says, "two miles down the road you're gonna turn to your buddy and say,’ I wish that ahole would've tried that sh*t with me!'"
The cop walked up and tapped on the window with his nightstick.
The driver rolled down his window and "WHACK," the cop smacked him in the head with his nightstick.
"What the hell was that for?" the driver asked.
"You're in Iowa, son," the Officer answered.
"When we pull you over in Iowa, you better have your license ready by the time we get to your car."
"I'm sorry. Officer," the driver said, "I'm from Wisconsin and didn't know your laws here".
The officer runs a check on the guy's license--he's clean and gives the guy his license back.
The officer then walks around to the passenger side and taps on the window.
The passenger rolls down the window and "WHACK," the officer smacks him on the head with the nightstick.
"What'd you do that for?" the passenger demands.
"Just making your wish come true." replied the officer.
"Making WHAT wish come true?" the passenger asks.
"Because I know you Cheese head types," the Officer says, "two miles down the road you're gonna turn to your buddy and say,’ I wish that ahole would've tried that sh*t with me!'"
If you only knew the reputation that Wisconsin drivers have once they've crossed the bridge into Dubuque!
Mel
Elio Addict
Cop stops a guy for running a stop sign. The guy says. "But I slowed down!"
Officer asks him to step out of the car and starts beating him over the head with his night stick.
The guy yells, "Stop, Stop!" The officer says, "How about if I slow down?"
Officer asks him to step out of the car and starts beating him over the head with his night stick.
The guy yells, "Stop, Stop!" The officer says, "How about if I slow down?"