hawg_ryder
Elio Addict
Friend of mine took a pix of an ANTIFA SJW heading for the Sturgis bike rally...
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Jokes! ( Not Necessarily Work Safe )
- Thread starter Keith Dahl
- Start date
hawg_ryder
Elio Addict
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hawg_ryder
Elio Addict
Would definitely qualify as a psycho-hosebeast!
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hawg_ryder
Elio Addict
Well, I got a couple of unwanted house guests dropping by next week (Marco n' Laura) so I gotta start doing some prep... Stay safe everyone! Holy Krap on a Kracker... Here we go again!
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Didn't you lose your house in the last hurricane? I'd be looking at moving inland real soon.
But wait, then you get wildfires and all kinds of other yuk.
But wait, then you get wildfires and all kinds of other yuk.
hawg_ryder
Elio Addict
I had 11.5" of water in my house for 6-7 days... Hurricane Harvey didn't impact me as a wind storm, but it dumped 62" inches of rain (all time record) north of me and we had major flooding in all the rivers so the whole area got hit... My house was built in 68 and had never gotten water in it before... Flooding sucks really bad but I had great friends that helped me and flood insurance... had to do a complete remodel on the house... Fire is worse... at least, I knew what I had and was able to file claims for it...
My house...
Flood started on 8/31/2017 Water had gone down some in this pix!
YUK!!! Meanwhile...back to the jokes....
One fine morning in the Garden of Eden, Adam awakened and looked over to his side only to find that nobody was there to share the beautiful sunrise with.
So he called upon God and said to him, "God, I’m tired of being alone, I want a woman. And I want her to cook, clean, sew, massage, and obey my every command."
Then God replied, "Well Adam, that’s going to cost you and arm and a leg."
Adam thought about it for a moment and then said, "What can I get for a rib?"
One fine morning in the Garden of Eden, Adam awakened and looked over to his side only to find that nobody was there to share the beautiful sunrise with.
So he called upon God and said to him, "God, I’m tired of being alone, I want a woman. And I want her to cook, clean, sew, massage, and obey my every command."
Then God replied, "Well Adam, that’s going to cost you and arm and a leg."
Adam thought about it for a moment and then said, "What can I get for a rib?"
A squirrel was sitting in an apple tree when all of a sudden a cow came climbing up the tree.
Surprised to see a climbing cow the squirrel asked the newcomer, "What in hell are you doing here?"
The cow's answer was, "I thought I'd eat some oranges."
"But this is an apple tree..."
The cow answered, "I know. I brought my own."
Surprised to see a climbing cow the squirrel asked the newcomer, "What in hell are you doing here?"
The cow's answer was, "I thought I'd eat some oranges."
"But this is an apple tree..."
The cow answered, "I know. I brought my own."
A very nervous young interviewee was asked to meet her interviewer at a local restaurant for breakfast,
while they discussed her abilities to perform a particular job.
Upon ordering some eggs and toast, the anxious young woman requested that her toast be well done. The waitress asks, "You want it burnt?"
The interviewee replies, "Well, I like my toast like I like my men."
The waitress replies, "A little dark?"
Embarrassed, the nervous applicant blurted out, "Well, I don't care about that. I just don't like it to go limp when I put it in my mouth."
She was hired on the spot. ...................
...................
while they discussed her abilities to perform a particular job.
Upon ordering some eggs and toast, the anxious young woman requested that her toast be well done. The waitress asks, "You want it burnt?"
The interviewee replies, "Well, I like my toast like I like my men."
The waitress replies, "A little dark?"
Embarrassed, the nervous applicant blurted out, "Well, I don't care about that. I just don't like it to go limp when I put it in my mouth."
She was hired on the spot. ...................
...................
A farmer and his wife were outside in their field and saw a spaceship land. Out of this spaceship came two strange creatures and one said,
"Hello earthlings, we are here to find out about your human sex life. Will you swap partners with us for a day?"
The farmer and his wife agreed. The next morning, the farmer asked his wife, "What happened?"
His wife replied, "It was the best sex I ever had! When he turned his left ear, his dick grew to 16 inches long, and when he turned his right ear,
it grew as fat as a sausage.”
Then the farmer screamed, "Well no wonder that bitch tried to rip my ears off!" ..................................
..................
"Hello earthlings, we are here to find out about your human sex life. Will you swap partners with us for a day?"
The farmer and his wife agreed. The next morning, the farmer asked his wife, "What happened?"
His wife replied, "It was the best sex I ever had! When he turned his left ear, his dick grew to 16 inches long, and when he turned his right ear,
it grew as fat as a sausage.”
Then the farmer screamed, "Well no wonder that bitch tried to rip my ears off!" .................
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