hawg_ryder
Elio Addict
Brian Shul (Habu driver) recounting his LA speed story... If you're a pilot you'll really appreciate this one! 
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Jokes! ( Not Necessarily Work Safe )
- Thread starter Keith Dahl
- Start date
Thank You.Brian Shul (Habu driver) recounting his LA speed story... If you're a pilot you'll really appreciate this one!
A nun is riding a long in a cab when the taxi driver says: "May I ask a favor, sister? It’s my fantasy to kiss a nun."
Nun: "Okay, but are you a Catholic and single?"
Driver: "I am both." (The nun fulfilled driver's fantasy and kissed him.)
Driver: "Thank you sister. But I confess I lied. I'm married and a Muslim."
Nun: "That's ok, because I lied too. I'm attending a costume party and my name is Carlo."
Nun: "Okay, but are you a Catholic and single?"
Driver: "I am both." (The nun fulfilled driver's fantasy and kissed him.)
Driver: "Thank you sister. But I confess I lied. I'm married and a Muslim."
Nun: "That's ok, because I lied too. I'm attending a costume party and my name is Carlo."
A Doctor giving a speech with the latest medicine findings.
He said: "Here's good news for all of you who need blood transfusions, although this may be of some interest to any of you.
The AMA (The American Medical Association) researchers have made a remarkable discovery.
It seems that some patients needing blood transfusions may benefit from receiving chicken blood rather than human blood.
So far we've learned it tends to make the men cocky and the women lay better."
He said: "Here's good news for all of you who need blood transfusions, although this may be of some interest to any of you.
The AMA (The American Medical Association) researchers have made a remarkable discovery.
It seems that some patients needing blood transfusions may benefit from receiving chicken blood rather than human blood.
So far we've learned it tends to make the men cocky and the women lay better."
hawg_ryder
Elio Addict
hawg_ryder
Elio Addict
one less thing to worry about!
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Four nuns are out driving in the church Rambler, headed back to the convent after a night of bingo. It's a rainy night.
Regretfully, the car spun out of control, plunged off a cliff, and they all died.
When they arrived at the Pearly Gates, St. Peter said, "Nun number one, what did you sin when you were alive?"
"Well, I once saw a man's penis," she replied.
"Good grief. Take some of the holy water, wash out your eyes, and come on in. We'll let you slide this time."
"Nun number two, what did you sin when you were alive?"
"Well, I once touched a man's penis," she replied.
"Oh Lord. Take some of the holy water, wash out your eyes and your hands, and come on in."
Nun number four then skipped in front of nun number three, and said, "Excuse me, I'd like to gargle before she sits in that water!"
Regretfully, the car spun out of control, plunged off a cliff, and they all died.
When they arrived at the Pearly Gates, St. Peter said, "Nun number one, what did you sin when you were alive?"
"Well, I once saw a man's penis," she replied.
"Good grief. Take some of the holy water, wash out your eyes, and come on in. We'll let you slide this time."
"Nun number two, what did you sin when you were alive?"
"Well, I once touched a man's penis," she replied.
"Oh Lord. Take some of the holy water, wash out your eyes and your hands, and come on in."
Nun number four then skipped in front of nun number three, and said, "Excuse me, I'd like to gargle before she sits in that water!"
hawg_ryder
Elio Addict
You mean a repost? Never!! I don't remember a joke like that before.
If so, apologizes, it was not meant to be, it was simply a repost of a joke I got the other day.
If so, apologizes, it was not meant to be, it was simply a repost of a joke I got the other day.
I know this one's not a repeat:
A guy is in court for murdering his second wife. The judge says,"You murdered your first wife also, correct?"
"That's right. I fed her poisoned mushrooms. I've done my time."
The judge decided to probe a little further. "Yet you bashed your second wife to death. Why the change in M.O?"
"Well, your Honor," the defendant replied. "The bitch wouldn't eat her mushrooms."
A guy is in court for murdering his second wife. The judge says,"You murdered your first wife also, correct?"
"That's right. I fed her poisoned mushrooms. I've done my time."
The judge decided to probe a little further. "Yet you bashed your second wife to death. Why the change in M.O?"
"Well, your Honor," the defendant replied. "The bitch wouldn't eat her mushrooms."