Can we go back to the jokes please?
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Jokes! ( Not Necessarily Work Safe )
- Thread starter Keith Dahl
- Start date
Can we go back to the jokes please?
Ty
Elio Addict
Sure. What do you call someone who can't decide between a 1/3 chance and a 1/2 chance? I don't know but chances are someone will!
... or did you mean GOOD jokes?
NSTG8R
Elio Addict
Literally laughed out loud after reading this one! Sorry about the tiny print!
Can we go back to the jokes please?
NSTG8R
Elio Addict
Can we go back to the jokes please?
It was a joke. Here's a text version so people don't need a magnifying glass to read it.
My Favorite Animal
Our teacher asked what my favorite animal was, and I said, "Fried chicken."
She said I wasn't funny, but she couldn't have been right, because everyone else laughed.
My parents told me to always tell the truth.
I did.
Fried chicken is my favorite animal.
I told my dad what happened, and he said my teacher was probably a member of PETA.
He said they love animals very much.
I do, too. Especially chicken, pork and beef. Anyway, my teacher sent me to the principal's office.
I told him what happened, and he laughed, too. Then he told me not to do it again.
The next day in class my teacher asked me what my favorite live animal was.
I told her it was chicken. She asked me why, so I told her it was because you could make them into fried chicken..
She sent me back to the principal's office.
He laughed, and told me not to do it again.
I don't understand.
My parents taught me to be honest, but my teacher doesn't like it when I am.
Today, my teacher asked us to tell her what famous person we admire most.
I told her, "Colonel Sanders."
Guess where I am now....
Who needs magnifying glasses? I just pressed CTRL-+ to increase the size of the image until I could read it, then CTRL-- until the page displayed at the right size.
Ty
Elio Addict
Sometimes, I squat on the floor, grab my knees and lean forward.
That's how I roll!
That's how I roll!
Little Johnny was at school one day when the teacher asked the kids if they could use the word definitely in a sentence.
Well the first little girl raised her hand and said, "Well, the trees are definitely green."
The teacher said, "No not really because the trees turn yellow red and brown in the fall."
The next little boy raised his hand and said, "The sky is definitely blue."
The teacher said, "No not really because the sky can be all different colors."
From the back of the room little Johnny raised his hand and asked, "Do farts have lumps?"
The teacher said, "No Johnny of course not, that’s silly."
Then Johnny said, "Well, then I definitely shit my pants!"
Well the first little girl raised her hand and said, "Well, the trees are definitely green."
The teacher said, "No not really because the trees turn yellow red and brown in the fall."
The next little boy raised his hand and said, "The sky is definitely blue."
The teacher said, "No not really because the sky can be all different colors."
From the back of the room little Johnny raised his hand and asked, "Do farts have lumps?"
The teacher said, "No Johnny of course not, that’s silly."
Then Johnny said, "Well, then I definitely shit my pants!"
NSTG8R
Elio Addict
I learned something today!
I use Microsoft's new browser: Edge
In the upper eight corner it has ...
You click on the 3 dots, and a menu opens, 3rd one down says "Zoom" I just click the + till it got to a size I could read it (250%)
When I finished reading it, I just clicked it again and brought it back down.
In the upper eight corner it has ...
You click on the 3 dots, and a menu opens, 3rd one down says "Zoom" I just click the + till it got to a size I could read it (250%)
When I finished reading it, I just clicked it again and brought it back down.